We are almost done with January 2017. So far, it has not been a good year.
Usually, a new year gets me rejuvenated. I like a clean slate, a blank calendar, another chance at getting it right. But this year has been different. I seem to have been stuck under a dark cloud.
Maybe depression? Not sure. The uglyness going on in this country has been overwhelming.
I realized the other day that I felt the same way 4 years ago at the last election.
A feeling of hopelessness. People hating/attacking one another.
But I can't give the whole credit to that.
Something else... I've been feeling a sense of 'impending doom'. Death. Not a good feeling!
I KNOW when I hit these moments, it is directly connected to my walk with God.
OR I should clarify: my LACK of walk with God.
I have gotten lazy. Spending too much time on the computer playing games, social media....
I have been in this hole, not knowing how (OR maybe not wanting to) get out.
Still going about life, doing what I am supposed to do, joy and happiness is overrated, right?
I reached out to my dear friend, and she responded with this Scripture:
Psalm 16:8-11I keep my eyes on the Lord. With him at my right hand. I will not be shaken. Therefore my heart is glad and my tongue rejoices; my body also will rest secure, because you will not abandon me to the realm of the dead, nor will you let your faithful one see decay. You make known to me the path of life; you will fill me with joy in your presence, with eternal pleasures at you right hand.
Therefore since we are surrounded by a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles. And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us, fixing our eyes on Jesus, the pioneer and perfecter of faith. For the joy set before him he endure the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. Consider him who endured such opposition from sinners, so that you will not grow weary and loose heart.
I have been weary, looking at what is going on around me. At the failure that I am.
Of course this world is going to let me down. Of course I am going to fail. We are all broken.
But God IS perfect.
He has given me (AND YOU) all that is needed to finish the race that is called life!
The tools are in His Word. We just have to go to them.
Lauren Daigle has a new song out called "Come Alive (dry bones)".
I liked it the 1st time I heard it, mainly because it has a great sound.
But hadn't really listened to the words till now.......
I am dry bones. I have allowed myself to become brittle.
Well, can't let it continue. It is wasteful.
God loves me. In every condition: healthy, thriving, sad, lazy, and brittle...
And I am glad He does.
But, man, if I was Him, I would be saying
"Get a grip, girl! I have given you all you need, so USE it!"
So today is my New Year's Day.
Am I going to mess up and fall again? Yea, most definitely.
But I am not going to stay in the hole. I do NOT need to be wasting my days like I have been.
I am going to post this on FB so that this time next year, it reminds me of what I said.
Cuz I am sure I am going to need it!!
PS: I want to be my friend when I grow up!